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WATCH: Gay porn star reveals HIV status in candid video

Written by gaytourism

Adult entertainment performer Kayden Gray has posted a video in which he discloses that he is HIV positive.

In the video, the London-based performer and escort says he was diagnosed 3.5 years ago, nine months into his porn career.

Talking of his reasons for making the video, he says, ‘I know some people won’t like it, but that’s more of a reason why it should happen. And why I would like everyone to know that I’m HIV positive.

‘I can’t sit on this secret’ he says, having kept it to himself for so long already.

He talks candidly about how he became infected.

‘I went to a party and had unprotected sex with multiple guys, and it was fun. Then I was sick.’

After a week he thought he was getting better, but then things got worse and he lost weight and had extreme flu-like symptoms. He says he know that many people who become HIV are asymptomatic and experience no illness at first, but for him it was ‘very obvious something was wrong.’

In the immediate aftermath of his diagnosis, he felt ‘unlovable’, ‘disgusting’ and that his life was going to end. He now has an undetectable viral load.

‘It’s actually very safe to have a completely regular, if not slightly crazy, sex life.’

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‘It takes one mistake’

He wants others to learn from his experiences.

‘All of you who are negative and who are listening to this thinking this doesn’t affect you because you are not stupid, you are not a whore, you can take care of yourself. Well guess what? I used to say exactly the same things, and like you, I used the word “clean.”

‘The thing is, you see, it takes one mistake, it takes one night out, one chill-out, one bareback f**k to join the club. It really is that easy. If you’re the kind of guy who sits on the dick first and then asks questions, then you my friend have speedy boarding onto this ride.’

He says living with HIV is hard, but ‘the worst part is the judgment, and even cruelty. Not even from the general public but from people from your own community. I know where that comes from, because you want to disassociate yourself from the problem, but it doesn’t help.’

He credits a gay men’s sexual and mental health support group, Impulse London, with helping him and other guys to deal with the reality of being HIV positive. He now works for the advocacy director.

‘It gets better,’ he says, addressing those who may be struggling with a diagnosis. ‘The dust will settle. And eventually you realize that as painful as this experience is, having HIV is not that bad. It’s actually an experience that has taught me so much and has given me so much appreciation for my own life.’

For more information on HIV and AIDS, those in the UK can call THT Direct on 0808 802 1221. Internationally, check out these support helplines for more advice. 

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